Hello!
We've not posted for a few days, thanks to a very busy weekend - one of our friends, Hayley, came to visit us at university. Hayley is very skinny - she's recently been on a diet and lost loads of weight. This got us thinking - most people want to lose weight (us included but we're lazy and like crisps/chips/burgers/pizzas/bread/chocolate/sweets too much), and there are probably numerous websites with 'top tips to lose weight'. We thought, why not write a list of top tips to obesify?! So here they are:
1. Always finish everything on your plate. This means everything. Even condiments.
2. Eat whenever you're bored.
3. If it gets to 1:00am and you still haven't gone to bed, have a second dinner.
4. Dessert is mandatory after every meal - even breakfast.
5. Obesity is a mobility difficulty (not being able to fit through gaps, etc), so don't feel bad about getting the lift/escalator, even if it's just up one floor.
6. If you get a Diet Coke (opposed to full fat) in McDonald's with your meal, you're allowed to make it a large, and get a McFlurry too!
7. If you're bored and want to eat but you still feel full, make yourself sick or force out a poo.
8. Food consumed when under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol doesn't count in your daily calorie intake.
9. This also counts for days when you feel hungover, ill or mentally fragile.
10. This also counts for food consumed between the hours of 1:00am and 7:00am, and on weekends.
Happy obesifying!
Georgina and Emma x
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